I’ve had an interesting and moving day. At about 2.30 this afternoon I had a call at work from somebody totally unexpected. Someone who always seems okay enough and who is brilliant at her job. Under the surface she’s in bits. She was given my number by a ‘professional’ and told to call me. I’m meeting her for a chat on Sunday. I’m fairly open about having my own frailties and vulnerabilities – that’s how come the person gave her my number.
It just somehow doesn’t feel like a co-incidence. There’s been a few of those co-incidences that don’t feel like co-incidences lately.
I had to end the call because someone was waiting outside my office to talk to me. She is somebody I’ve worked with. She’s Christian and she knows I am. She said that God had told her to bring me a box of books. Part of her process at the moment is moving on from being somebody with a ‘bad history’ to somebody who has her whole life ahead of her. And giving me this box was saying goodbye to a period in her life. This box of books fascinated me…
In 1999, I began to understand what my problems really were. Not the cause of my problems. I’d known that for ages. But how circumstances had impacted me and the survival strategies I’d used. I was diagnosed with DID soon after. I’m against labels as a rule. Often they just tell you who to be. But sometimes they can give you a starting point to move from. At the time, I looked for Christian information and resources. I managed to find a couple of websites that were helpful but nothing else. I phoned or wrote to all the big christian healing bods in the UK. Most didn’t know what I was talking about. Some said it was dodgy. The rest didn’t reply! It was a scary and very very lonely time.
Anyway this box of goodies was just what I was looking for back then! I laughed when I rifled through the box. All about dissociation and DID. And all Christian. Some of it has been produced in the last couple of years by the organisations who had no idea what I was talking about back then. In one way it was validating. In another I thought ‘no-one has to feel as alone as I did with it!’. Hopefully it will become better and better understood. It really ain’t rocket science after all!
That’s all I wanted to say really.
I’ve photo-shopped bits off the front of the book cover above (one of the books in the box) because this is a child friendly blog! You can look it up on amazon or somewhere if you’re interested. I think I’ll read this one.
He has cancer. And he’s old 
